Palestine - The West Bank's second largest supplier of rocks, bottles and other projectile weapons has introduced a new environment-friendly bottle for consumers. "Green Grudge Glass," as Ahmid Rhulamb refers to it, is "the weapon of the future." Rhulamb has been a supplier of rocks since 1967, but he expanded his business to bottles in 1994 to meet with the new trend of protesting. "It is hard to keep up with the changing times." tells Rhulamb, "You never know what these kids are going to be throwing from day to day." Rhulamb has been the marketing force behind other conceptions such as "Statement Stones" and "Bargaining Branches". Both items have been favorites of Palestine protesters over the years, however with Afghanistan rapidly gaining stone market share, Rhulamb has had to make changes. "I think I have really come up with a top product. Old glass could be buried in the side of an Embassy for years, while my new product is biodegradable, non-toxic and is usually swept up and placed in my warehouse by Green Peace Monkeys a few days after each protest."
Other suppliers are attempting to launch similar items in competition with Rhulamb. Hamala Gnuntza, owner of Shattered Dreams Projectile, has released his "Stink Rock". Gnuntza tells us that is still does the same damage as other rocks, while it leaves an unpleasant smell. Embassy workers who have already been plummeted with these stones tell us the odor is more like Caesar salad.

[ 09-18-2002, 08:54 PM: Message edited by: Robbie ]

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