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Sometime this year, we taxpayers will likely receive another economic stimulus.

It is indeed a very exciting program, and I’ll explain it by using a Q&A format:

 Q: What is an Economic Stimulus?

A: It is money that the federal government will send to taxpayers.

 Q: Where will the government get this money?

A: From taxpayers.

 Q: Is the government simply giving me back my own money, then?

A: No, only a smidgen of it.

 Q: What is the purpose of this payment?

A: The plan is for you to use the money to purchase a high definition television set, a new iPad, or a new SUV, thus stimulating the economy.

 Q: Isn’t that stimulating the economy of China?

A: Shut up.

 Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the U. S. Economy with your stimulus check. Use it wisely:

 * If you spend the stimulus money at Walmart the money will go to China or Sri Lanka.

* if you spend it on gasoline, it money will go to the Arabs.

* if you purchase a computer, it goes to India, Taiwan or China.

* if you purchase fruits and vegetables, it will go to Mexico, Honduras, and Guatemala.

* if you buy an efficient car, it will go to Japan or Korea. 

* if you purchase useless stuff, it goes to Taiwan. 

* if you pay your credit card off, or buy stock, it will go to management bonuses and they will hide it offshore. 

 Instead, keep the money in America by:

 (1) Spending it at a yard sale or

(2) Going to a ballgame or

(3) Spending it on prostitutes or

(4) Beer or

(5) Tattoos 

(These are the only American businesses still operating in the U.S.)

 CONCLUSION: Go to a ballgame with a tattooed prostitute that you met at a yard sale and drink beer all day.

 No need to thank me, I’m just glad I could be of help.

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Man comes home, finds his wife with his friend in bed.   
And shoots his friend   dead .
Wife says "If you continue to behave like this, you will lose ALL your friends!"

                     ~~~~~   

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1 hour ago, JDMeister said:

91919317_2523668421071052_3366305996925304832_n.png

funny

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1 hour ago, JDMeister said:

91919317_2523668421071052_3366305996925304832_n.png

Yep, them geologic types.....Stoned Rock, Intense Rock, and "Kick your @ss" Rock!

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